So My Husband’s Love Language Is Not “Subtle Messages Through Facebook Wall Posts” (Good to Know)

Michael: “If you ever come home with a five-foot metal rooster, we’re getting a divorce.”

Me: “I think you’re missing the point. I put that on your Facebook wall with a message about picking your battles. Besides, I’d never do that.”

Micheal: “What would it be? A camera? Lenses?”

Summer: “Oh, fudge you.”

(Oh, no he didn’t. It took me less than 48 hours to raise the money for this camera and I sold a birthday present, 30 minutes after I listed it by the way, for the lens.)

Summer:”It’s like you’re ASKING me in the subtext of this conversation to go out and find the most obnoxious yard ornament that I could fit into a car. It’s like you’re hoping there is a camera crew for a show called “how not to pick your battles” hiding in the closet. Anyway, You know it wouldn’t be a chicken.”

Michael: “Don’t even think about it.”

Me: “I’m not the one who brought up divorce over a blog post.”

Michael: “Oh shut up. You say you’re going to divorce me all the time.”

Me: “But that’s over important things like the recycling.”

Michael: “Fair enough. I’m just saying.”

Me: “Look, I’M just saying. The lesson is if you don’t pick your battles well and you’re married to someone wickedly funny, you may find yourself at the cock end of an excellent prank. That’s all. And in the end you could still end up with a new set of towels only they’ll say ‘knock knock, motherfudgeer’ on them. I’m just saying.”

(Project Love Languages is going GREAT you guys.)

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